For every busy shopper in the Mall of America there is a gift certificate the size of a deluxe bite-size Whopper. The shopper with the most coupons can win all the gift certificates if nine and nine never add up to twelve, a yellow twelve with pieces of chocolate surrounding the savory number. Twelves are for sale next to the jugs of ale in the counselor's twisted sense of bail.
The barrister on a banister rejected any illegal reasons to open a discotheque written on a legal pad. He did not know that the place was called THE LEGAL PAD after the barrister's backwards and fiendish scandals involving linen closets and the easy women found inside them. No, they weren't dead. The banister found a way to preserve women's sex appeal, but they had to be stored in linen closets. That's the story written by the journalists from the land of Overhype.
Overhype flashes in the eyes of dullards. Dullards are the people who love living in Overhype. Overhype is the land where it is possible for very small things to create big explosions. The land of Overhype is ruled by the Esquire Enquire and the Sun-Times of the Round Table. Esq. Enquire has the special capability to create any substance from concrete.
The real story behind the barrister on the banister is this: The sexy women volunteered to wait in the linen closets awaiting the butterfly's insectual message. There's nothing true about preserving sex appeal. Those rabble rousers from THE LEGAL PAD will go to the far reaches of the globe, such as the land of Overhype, to find a valid argument for their dancing establishment.
Without hesitation, an anchor detaches itself from the almighty cruise ship and heads for the underworld. This rebellious incident causes the Aluminux to float with the trade winds in the middle of the Atlantic night. Meanwhile the anchor finds the reservoir of other lost anchors joining in a current towards the rupture between the ocean floor and the underworld in the Mid-Atlantic Ridge.
Blue whales and bottle-nosed dolphins stare at the amazement as the procession of lost anchors head into a small fissure in the ridge. The intense heat emanating from the breach keeps the sea creatures distance, but it's not hot enough to keep away the insurgent anchors.
Once the Aluminux anchor marches through, it is amazed to discover a field of ice cream plasma. The surroundings are sweet and blinding because of an unknown source of light remaining a mystery to the renegade anchors. An anchor's realm of perception is very limited. What they cannot perceive is that the source of light is the fugitive eye from Eightron, the largest octopus that ever existed. Eightron could have easily become the King of the Ocean, but it was cursed with the fugitive eye that leads anchors astray. One day a cruise ship will veer so far off course that it will accidentally destroy Eightron, but this octopus has superintelligence. She speeds backward through the seven seas like a frightened lobster. Every living thing clears the way for Eightron, her body easily doubling the size of Bluto, the daddy-o of blue whales.
High above the speeding mass of the blind octopus is Radar Island, a vast desert island containing five thousand satellite dishes, none of them belonging to the superpowers of the globe. The only living being on this island is the hyphenated buffalo. Every morning it melts into a puddle of primordial residue that seeps into the bases of each satellite. The DNA sequence of the hyphenated buffalo is a sequence, which programs the satellites to either receive or transmit information not for the world, but for itself. The hyphenated buffalo's goal is to expand its mental capacity so large that the whole universe will collapse within its cranium.
By the afternoon, the hyphenated buffalo forms back into its hyphenated self to recreate alien viruses that were received as data to Radar Island. The first virus the hyphenated buffalo ever created is in all of us, but it is basically harmless. It makes us blind to the hyphenated buffalo and its island.
The alien races with higher morals than the buffalo and the human race try to stop this scheme, but they are always thwarted to the extent of extinction. The hyphenated buffalo has successfully killed off all aliens with morals greater than its own. It is a wonder that the human race still exists.
The robot's exposition's secret purpose is to eradicate the hyphenated buffalo, but no living thing knows of this scheme. Once the robot has the gentry in high spirits, the buffalo will be in no spirits. As the buffalo's life passes out of its malleable anatomy, then the infinite dimensionality of the universe will also pass away because the robot will unknowingly destroy the continuity of infinity. Things will begin to end and never reappear again. So as all forms of energy try to bail out, the Double-Pope will supply the planet Earth with a very convincingly easy exit.
THE END
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