Stopping a stop sign is ironic, but a very dumb thing to actually do. Picture someone like your grandma walking up to the red octagon and saying, "Stop!" Surreal but more half-witted than a piece of avant-garde performance art. The last leg collapsing under a dog is avant-garde, especially if it was a cat playing the role of a dog. All the cat fanciers would dig it.
Illustrations by the Madman interested Mr. Frederix, but when he opened the book he was surprised to see no illustrations at all. Instead he saw infinity and couldn't take his eyes away from it. No one take his or her eyes off infinity. Mr. Frederix lived the rest of his life with the book with the Madman's illustrations dangling just beyond his nose.
The Madman adopted Mr. Frederix as his coat hanger and tipped him a dime every time he hung up a new coat. The Madman always had one coat and it was an old one. Mr. Frederix died a very pitiful death from a pitiful existence. The Madman's books still sell like hotcakes, so he won't have to worry about losing a coat hanger for long.
Mr. and Mrs. Bickens were trapped and now have to support the Madman while he sleeps. They're adopted as beds. Miss Ketchum was adopted as his showerhead, and Mr. Childers as his spoon. The Madman's house is made of adopted people with books dangling off their faces.
In that land, a conveyor belt serves as the highway. It goes down, so far down that you have to shrink to pass through the pores of the earth's crust. Most of the passengers are droplets of rain that will have the privilege of not quenching the earth but visiting the world-renowned Magma Flow of Arachnes. Arachnes is the stingy turtle with the head and neck of a giraffe. She oversees the magma flow and makes sure that the minerals it spews contain something that will screw up humanity's industry.
Cough syrup is the only daily supplement that Arachnes demands. And so the rain droplets make sure to contain some evaporated cough syrup as they enter the spectacular Magma Flow. The steam rises to create a demi-god of new rain droplets. Arachnes' one super power is to give the gift of invincibility to the droplets that bestow evaporated cough syrup. This is why the water cycle never ends.
As the steam pushes the demi-god out of the Magma Flow of Arachnes it finds that the world is hilarious and whispers the secret of the Earth's jocularity to the clouds that then have such a laughing fit that they cry new cough syrup messengers down.
The bit about the clouds is hypothetical. What is known about the clouds is that within their condensed vapor are pieces of sports. A fraction of football was detected in a cumulus about an hour ago. This is why bad weather does not ruin the reception of sports events. Bad weather can only interfere on the game itself and that's if it's played outdoors.
The sports industry is building too many domes. This is because the municipal industries rejected the dome corporation's contract as bad weather protection. One dome company, Good Weather Domes, was near a contract with New York City to provide a unique ventilation system that would rid the town of all air pollution. Top secret government documents intercepted by certain individuals revealed that the reason for rejection was that it would hurt New York's tourism.
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